WHO'S IDEA

I have no idea who's idea it was, but my roommate Steve casually mentioned to me one day that he and his girlfriend had decided that they wanted to try out a 3-way. Were were just sitting there watching TV, having a beer, and that's what he said, just as plain as telling me he and his girlfriend decided to order pizza.

I didn't really know what to say, so I didn't, although I was instantly jealous of the bastard. His girlfriend, Julia, was totally smoking hot. We lived in student housing--not the dorms, but more like student apartments--and we had a weight room at the complex. No one really used it (I never saw anyone in there), but Julia made it her own workout place and would come over to use our shower, whether Steve was there or not, dressed in her skin-tight gym shorts, a jogging bra that cupped her perfect breasts, and her arms and legs and shoulders glowing with sweat. I didn't mind, but it was some form of mental torture to be studying at my desk in my small room, when inches through the cheap apartment wall, Julia stood naked in our shower, soaping and rinsing herself off. I swear, I am not a pervy kind of guy--I mean I have plently of porn on the internet, and have had girlfriends on and off through college. But seriously--it was not freaking fair to be so close to her and so impossibly cut off. So many fantasy scenarios played through my mind. Like maybe I'd walk in on her and pretend I'd forgotten she was in there...or maybe I'd have to fake like I was going to puke...or maybe I was "drunk" and fell into the bathroom... obviously they were totally stupid, and so I never did. I thought about drilling a hole in my bedroom wall, or figuring out how to mount a hidden camera.... I was that desperate--but not that immoral. Julia was actually pretty cool, and I liked having her come over.

What really got me is when she'd sleep over. As I lay awake trying to sleep, I'd hear the familiar tap of the bed against Steve's bedroom wall, the creeking of springs, and the slapping of flesh. They had athletic sex. Julia was not quiet. I didn't need a hidden mic to hear their love making--it was loud and clear through the thin walls. Julia would squeal and moan and then shriek when she came. Steve liked to talk dirty. I pretty much new exactly where he was about to cum on her body. And of course I tried not to picture it, and the harder I tried, the more vivid the image in my mind.

So I was jealous. Jealous that a dude like Steve (nice guy but nothing special) could nail such a cute and sweat nympho nearly every night. As if that wasn't fair, now they were going to bring in a third partner. Oh gheez, I thought. Freakin great. Not only will I have one hot chick coming over to use the shower, I'll have two. Maybe they'll take showers together. If so, I was definitely going to look into those hidden cameras.

"So, uh, you ever done a 3-way before," Steve asked. My mind had been reeling, and Steve had been waiting for me to respond in some way to his announcement.

"Uh, no," I said.

"Would you?" asked Steve.

"Well, duh," I said. Of course I had thought about it. What guy hasn't? What the hell. Not only would I have to listen to Steve and Julia humping in the room next to me, but now I'd have to listen to their menage-a-trios. How the hell could I do that without going insane?

"That's cool," Steve said. "I knew you'd be cool. Julia's coming over pretty soon."

"Thanks for the warming," I said.

He laughed. "Yeah," he said, "She said you'd be cool about it."

I then realized we had been having two totally different conversations. Steve wasn't telling me, he was asking. Being in my own head and own fantasies, I'd assumed that they'd want another hot chick in bed, but those fuckers were so kinky, they didn't want another chick, they wanted a dude to join in. Maybe because I was pretty chill to get along with, or maybe Steve didn't see me as a threat, or maybe Julia actually thought I was attractive...who knows.

I didn't know who's idea it was, but I didn't care. All I knew was that that things in the apartment were about to change, and I'd never have to worry about peep holes or hidden cameras, or making up excuses to crash into the bathroom again.